Tell Me (a letter to *him*)

Tell Me

Please
Say what I need to hear
Tell me you don’t love me
That it was all a lie
That you never want to see me
Ever again
That you’ve gotten what you wanted
And now you’re done with me
That the game was played and I lost
Even if none of it’s true
I need to hear it from you

Tell me that you never felt anything for me
And make me believe it
So I can stop dreaming of you every night
Stop analyzing the ways I can make it right
The ways I messed it all up

Remind me of how you had an encounter with your ex
Tell me that it wasn’t a mistake
Wasn’t stupid
Meant the world to you
Tell me she’s everything you need
That I could never be

Don't tell me you love me
Don't point out the reasons why
Stop saying all of those beautifully sweet things
Words I didn't even realize I longed to hear
Breaking down
The walls around my heart
My tough persona

Tell me I’m too cold, too shallow
Not pretty, not well-groomed enough
Call me a “G” but without the joking nature
Or say what that previous cat said
What was it again?
‘You don’t know how to comfort your man’
Or something to that effect
Tell me these things and make me believe it
Help me re-box my feelings
By hurting them if necessary
(I think it’s necessary)
Whatever the case is
Please
Just tell me

Entry from the Journal of a YBF - ms. me's MySpace Blog |

Entry from the Journal of a YBF - ms. me's MySpace Blog
Originally posted Wednesday, May 10, 2006 8:15 PM


(Guess I was "Thinking Bout My Ex" that night) - Janet Jackson song title.

what's the point? - ms. me's MySpace Blog |

what's the point? - ms. me's MySpace Blog
Originally posted Friday, May 05, 2006 7:51 PM

TWO TEARS - ms. me's MySpace Blog |

TWO TEARS - ms. me's MySpace Blog
Originally posted Monday, April 03, 2006 1:08 AM

The Revelation and Inspiration - ms. me's MySpace Blog |

The Revelation and Inspiration - ms. me's MySpace Blog
originally posted Wednesday, March 29, 2006 at 8:20 PM

Capricious Thoughts

I saw a link to this awesome Cleveland Show clip on Jorge Garcia's blog (Dispatches from the Island) this weekend. And wouldn't you know, I am still singing the song in my head. Check it out!







Everytime I watch it's still funny. And yes, I know I'm like a month late with this. But considering that I don't watch TV much anymore (I hear the shocked gasps) except for Lost (hence my following Jorge's blog), Dirty Jobs, and Deadliest Catch (R.I.P. Capt. Phil Harris [:.(] ) I miss a lot. But most of the time, that's a good thing; as this world gets worse and worse there are fewer and fewer things worth watching on TV. (I'll probably rant about this in a later blog.)

I must definitely enjoy my job because I woke up this morning and it was one of the first things on my mind. The very first thing...well I can't talk about that. (Too much like a guy that way, lol.)

But back to my job...I hope this feeling lasts and I never become one of those jaded teachers. You know the type, show up for the check, out the door before the kids when the bell rings, you can't tell them nothing because they've been 'teaching for _ # of years.'

Hmm...what else? Since I'm blogging again, I guess I'll export my other personal blog to this one so there will be some redesigning and a lot more content coming in the next few months. Besides Myspace is so dead!

Probably should combine my business blogs too...

Oh yeah and started working out again (finally) and evidently I either terribly out of shape or just worked out too long because I felt naseous for the rest of the evening. Oh well, the benefits outweigh the costs so I guess I'll have to stick with it.

Ok so I misspoke

I took a few moments and read my previous postings & decided not to procrastinate. True I still have "a million and 10 things" on my plate but this is therapeutic and seeing as I'm in therapy...why not get more on a more convenient schedule.

(Yes, I did say therapy; more on that later.)

As is obvious from the months delay to post the PC battle and my post minutes ago, I'm teaching. I was passed over by every middle school and ended up being hired at a high school on the Thursday of the week before school began. (AAGGHHH!!!!) But Jah knows best (as always :D ) and high school is the place for me and the schedule works out very well. I'm still learning the ropes and now my EPI classes, while still very helpful, can't be over soon enough so I can have my weekends back.

This weekend classes thing only added to an underlying problem that's been going on for months now and recently blew up in my face. So that setback along with some unreconciled issues from my past (which I guess I have to stop avoiding and deal with to move on with my plan from an earlier post [not guess, know]) explains the therapy...and the meds. Ok maybe TMI. But hey at least I'm not like this guy all the time anymore...

I call him the "Suicidal Orange"; he's gonna juice his brains out, lol.

I'm a teacher!

That's the only new and good news.

Lots more to follow this summer...perhaps ;)